Introduction
Hello! In this post, we address one of the most popular and ever-present questions of interpersonal relations: how to find friends? Whenever it is us feeling lonely, looking for mates to hang out with on the weekend, or building a professional network, we might desire to find and make friends.
First of all, the author of this article has to note that there is no universal method to find friends. But, as with any broad and individual matter, there is a way to deliver the actionable insights: compilation! There are a lot of people who have encountered the need to make friends. Let’s gather some of their opinions together.
For solutions, we went to Reddit and gathered tips from community members on how to find friends. Below you can see the selected points with comments from us.
1. Volunteering
“Volunteering is a great way to meet new people and make friends.”
Definitive characteristic of volunteering: you are doing together an uneasy, mostly unpaid, job for a significant period of time. A person would opt into something like that only of deeper, more profound beliefs. Since the friends, especially soulmates, tend to share the values and at least some views, volunteering to do things you consider important is a great way to meet prospective associates. And the experience of going through challenges together is a nice bonus.
2. Work
“I know this doesn't work for everyone, but outside of college, most of my newer friends are all previous or current coworkers.”
If the proof of mutual cooperation and problem solving is an important quality of the friend of yours, you can consider your coworkers as potential candidates. Since you are reading this, there might not be a lot of options at your current job. Then, you should attribute more weight to the “team” factor whenever you look for a new occupation.
The good option as well is past coworkers. You already know them to some extent, but there are no aggravating factors like a competition or necessity to interact often.
3. Clubs
“I’m thinking about joining a cult”
That’s a tricky one. Of course, there are a lot of clubs by interests out there. Attending some must be the top idea for finding friends. But the shared hobby alone might not be a strong predictor of becoming friends with a person. Besides that, there are other aspects you’ve got to match on.
A couple of points regarding a hobby choice. First, do you have enough time? Usually, the activity takes a few hours a week + potential extension if you’d like to get to know someone better afterwards. Second, mind the group members variety based on your needs. There are more homogeneous groups, like a sports club of a business school, and more diverse, like a city-wide language-speaking club. Do you want to meet people somehow like you or completely different ones?
4. Apps
“There’s a “Friends only” section of Craigslist”
Looking for friends in the apps (dating ones as well) is particularly useful because people featured there kind of know what they want. There are fields to fill out about yourself and a lot of personalities to check. So, matching with people online, you can assume that this happened not due to a mere physical propinquity but preliminary traits matching. Also, it takes some degree of openness and psychological courage to disclose the intention of looking for friends. So, the person must be serious about that.
Apps that were mentioned often: bumble bff, tinder, meetup. You should check out the popular services at your location too.
5. Your memory
“Friendships take effort, especially as we get older”
For the last one, we would like to introduce the unique option that has not been mentioned in the materials we reviewed. That is your memory! In other words, the personal network. Every person sees a lot of people over the course of life. Let yourself think: is there anyone you wouldn't mind knowing better now? Circumstances change, people evolve, so the ones we barely knew before might become fitting mates for your current interests, lifestyle, etc.
Reaching out to people you’ve met previously has a couple of advantages. First, looking into your memory is relatively quick to perform. Second, you already have some trust and information from your prior encounters. So, if you recall a good person, check out how they are doing (that’s simpler if they’re on social media). Then, think how you can smoothly get to know them better.
Conclusion
In conclusion, two more general tips-not-places on making friends:
1) Know yourself
2) Things take time
Why it is important? Ask us on team@knei.space or social media. Good luck on your journey!
References
- https://www.reddit.com/r/socialskills/comments/18sn4zf/where_do_i_find_friends/
- https://www.reddit.com/r/Adulting/comments/1d5p4ce/how_tf_are_yall_finding_friends_irl/
- https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/qo8vme/serious_where_the_fuck_are_you_supposed_to_find/
- https://www.reddit.com/r/Adulting/comments/17kapeh/how_do_you_make_friends_in_your_30s/
- https://www.reddit.com/r/socialskills/comments/mxk6jq/recommended_apps_for_more_socially_introverted/
- https://www.knei.space/blog/propinquity-effect
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